My brand new third hand.

[I broke a cardinal, and I like it. Alexander Wang Brenda Camera Bag, Shopbop.]

Anyone who spends any extended period of time with me knows I’m firmly anti-purse.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, they’re beautiful and I wish I could afford a zillion of them—mostly I’m hung up on old dogs like that YSL horn handle bag or the Gucci tapestry hobo, but I wouldn’t turn down a Chloe satchel or a Rag & Bone flight bag—however the thing is, I hate carrying them. I hate looking for things in them, I hate having one on the back of my chair, I hate being asked to put things in them, and I hate standing around with one on my shoulder. I hate the anchor to girlishness that it quite literally yokes around my neck. Chill—I don’t look at women who carry a purse and think twice—y’all are foxes—it’s just not for me. I feel like a faker.

A few years ago, I got the best jacket of all times, a luscious All Saints leather with tubular astronaut-style arm patches and zippers and stuff. By this time, I’d narrowed my bag collection down to two, only one of which got used: an ancient fringed YSL suede cross-body with beer stains all over it, and a Dannijo tapestry bag that doubles as a laptop bag. (Even my old Louis Vuitton Speedy has been relegated to my under-the-sink nail polish bag. I’m such a bully.)

Anyway, I noticed that I only ever put four things in a purse: a car key, my tiny card case, my phone, and a chapstick. (Occasionally a small bottle of bourbon, but sadly not often enough.) From then on, the three zippered pockets on my sweet-ass biker jacket became the only purse I’d ever need. It hung neatly on the back of my seat, traveled well on airplanes, rode shotgun with me, and I rarely went anywhere without it anyway. I had become 100% antipurse and life was good.

Only problem? Summer.

[Flashback: the tapestry bag doing a-ok on a quick trip to Austin.]

My jacket does her job from fall to winter to spring, but during the summer I needed another option—preferably one that fit into my bike basket, or even better, was tiny enough that I could fit it and a six pack in my bike basket. I’ve bought belts to keep my shorts up with the weight of wallets and phones I always have jammed in my back pockets, but sitting becomes problematic. Clutches are out—I’m really into Snapchatting strangers sleeping in their cars these days, so I always need both hands.

I’d had my eye on this exact purse since roughly my third day of writing this blog, sometime back in 2008. Alexander Wang is just as central to my wardrobe now as he was then, and this little Brenda camera bag was the ticket. I asked Chad what he thought of it (he’s pretty keen on the fact that I only have one purse, because I think it makes me a unicorn of sorts) and he said “Well, it’s definitely ‘you’,” and I clicked “Place Order” and that was the story of the time I got a purse for the first time in like over 6 years.

Here she is. The Brenda Camera bag. And she’s perfect.

Only other problem? I now want this one, this one, and still definitely want this one—in every color.

-C.